The Scriptures call us to love all people. But what does it mean to love someone? Pick someone to see if you love them. Go through the following traits of love and test yourself. Do you love them?
1. Love is shown through deeds – True love is not about words or good intentions. As 1 John 3:18 says, “let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” True love is expressed in deeds. When you see _______ in need, and you can help, do you act?
2. Love acts for the well-being of a person – Romans 13:10 says, “Love does no wrong to a neighbor.” God loved us by giving his Son for our salvation – John 3:16; Romans 5:8. If you love someone, you will not try to hurt them. Rather, you will try to do what is good for them. Through your words and actions do you harm, injure or hurt _______? Or do you seek what is good for him/her?
3. Love builds others up – 1 Corinthians 8:1 says, “knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.” It is easy to put down others when you think you know more than they do or that you are smarter than them. But love doesn’t act this way. Love seeks to lift others up through encouragement and help. Do you encourage and strengthen _______? Or, do you discourage and tear him/her down?
4. Love is not self-centered – Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13:5, “Love does not insist on its own way.” Love listens to others and is considerate of their point of view. Love is not pushy only wanting to get its own way. Are you considerate of _______ and what they think? Or do you simply try to get what you want?
5. Love is glad for the success of others – This shows up in two phrases in 1 Corinthians 13 – “Love does not envy” – (v. 4) and “Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing” or as some translations put it – “does not gloat over the failure of others” – (v. 6). Since life is not all about you, you can be happy when others do well in life. Are you glad when _______ does well?
6. Love is respectful of others – 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, “Love is not rude.” It does not dishonor others. Love shows dignity and honor to others. Do you show proper respect to _______?
7. Love is kind to others – 1 Corinthians 13:4 says “Love is kind.” This is a broad word that means tenderhearted, considerate, compassionate, gentle and merciful. Are you kind and gentle to _______?
8. Love is humble before others – Two phrases from 1 Corinthians 13:4 make this point – “Love does not boast” and “Love is not arrogant.” Love does not cause us to lift ourselves over others, but to lower ourselves before them. Do you show humility to ______?
9. Love serves others – Paul says, “through love serve one another” – Galatians 5:13. We lower ourselves in order to help others with their needs. Are you willing to serve _______?
10. Love sacrifices for others – This is a central part of what love is about. Jesus says in John 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lays down his life for his friends.” John says, “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers” (1 John 3:16). Are you willing to sacrifice to help ______ with what he/she truly needs?
11. Love is giving – 1 John 3:17 says, “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” If _______ has a real material need, and you can help, do you?
12. Love is honest – Ephesians 4:15 talks about “speaking the truth in love.” 1 Corinthians 13:6 says, “Love . . . rejoices with the truth.” Sometimes we don’t speak the truth because we don’t want to hurt someone, or cause trouble. So we keep quiet when there is a problem. But love means you have integrity with others. You are honest, not to hurt them, but so you can have a real relationship with them, not an artificial one. Are you honest with _______ when there is a problem? Or are you two-faced?
13. Love is slow to anger – 1 Corinthians 13:5 says, “Love is not irritable” or “Is not easily angered.” Love is not quick tempered, but is willing to overlook minor offenses. Are you quick to find fault or express your anger towards _______?
14. Love is longsuffering – 1 Corinthians 13:4 says, “love is patient.” The word means longsuffering, which means you are able to suffer for a long time. 1 Corinthians 13:7 says “love bears all things.” That is, it puts up with annoyance or difficulty. Similarly 1 Corinthians 13:8 says, “love endures all things.” Do you bear with _______ weaknesses and endure his/her failings? Or are you impatient and intolerant?
15. Love seeks peace with others – Colossians 2:2 speaks of hearts “being knit together in love.” Love draws people together. Colossians 3:14 says, “And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.” Verse 15 then goes on to talk about unity in the church. When there is conflict or misunderstanding, love compels you to do the hard work necessary to find peace with the other person. Are you willing to seek peace with _______?
16. Love forgives – Paul says, “Love does not keep a record of wrongs” (1 Corinthians 13:5). Peter says, “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8). To cover sins is another way of talking about forgiveness. Are you willing to forgive _______? Or do you hold resentments and bitterness?
17. Love is trusting – 1 Corinthians 13:7 says, “Love believes all things.” This doesn’t mean that you are naïve. It means that, unless there is good evidence to the contrary, you are willing to extend trust. Are you willing to believe _______? Or are you overly suspicious and distrustful?
18. Love is hopeful – 1 Corinthians 13:7 says, “Love hopes all things.” Love is optimistic, even when things aren’t going well. You leave the door open to healing with the other person. Are you open to healing with _______?
19. Love is a commitment – It is not based on feelings, which can come and go. God commands us “you shall love your neighbor as yourself” – Mark 12:31. You can’t command a feeling, but you can command a choice and a commitment. Are you committed to love _________ whether you feel like it or not?
20. Love is impartial – You don’t take into account how someone might be different than you, or how favoring them might help you. Speaking of favoring the rich over the poor, James 2:8-9 says, “If you really fulfill the royal law according to the Scripture, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself,’ you are doing well. But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors.” This would also apply to other social distinctions as well. If _______ is different than you in race, economic status or social status, does this affect your love?
21. Love is not based on how the person treats you – Jesus says, “Love your enemies . . . For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have?” (Matthew 5:44, 46). Paul says, “overcome evil with good” (Romans 12:21). Even if someone harms you, you will not return harm for harm, but return love and good. Do you love _______ even when he/she doesn’t love you or treat you well? Or do you try to get even?
How did you do? If you find yourself struggling, don’t be surprised. It is very difficult to love someone in this way. This kind of love does not come naturally from the human heart. Rather this kind of love comes from God, because God is this kind of love (I John 4:7). This love is supernatural. It is a fruit of the Spirit of God working in our lives (Galatians 5:22).
Since this is so, we should pray that God will change our heart and empower us to love others in this supernatural way.
William Higgins
Christian teaching 
Leave a Reply